Not by Might, Nor by Power

I have been in church leadership discussions for a number of years. My father was an associate pastor and music pastor in my youth, allowing me at a young age a front row seat to the inner working of a church. In one church of about 2000, where I spend much of my energy for 10 years, I was involved in many discussions about how to make the church successful. I was also a deacon there for a couple of years. I was not on the leadership committee, but I regularly had the ear of one or more of the pastors. I was even in a reading group with one of the pastors where we discussed classics like Resident Aliens. In addition, on my own, read a fair amount on the topic of church and spirituality.

I have read or discussed many “best practices.” I have heard many say that if we want to grow and reach people we have to do this or that. There were discussions of quasi Social Sciences, surveys and marketing plans. Oddly enough, there was not always the asking what God wanted. Had we properly entertained the idea that God may want to buck the system? Whose responsibility is it anyway to build a church? Ours or God’s?

The other day, a friend of mine commented that there is some truth in the claims of the church growth gurus, yet there is something that falls short in it also. It is my opinion that churches can often grow some by getting larger parking lots, or relocating to another part of town and totally leave God out of the loop. Many ideas can help some, but we do not rise or fall by this or that survey. A frightening warning is that Jesus said, “Behold I stand at the door and knock” to a church.

Let’s be biblical about this. It is not by our might or by our power, but by the Spirit of God that a church prospers. Prospering means not only growing in numbers, but growing deep spiritual roots and maturity. A church grows from its knees. A church grows as it grows in likeness to the one it worships. A church should grow not because it has what others want, but it has what they need. Social Science can help some, but as Os Guinness has taught us, they should be used with caution, and never as a solution.

I find it amazing that, believing in a miracle-working God, we almost expect him not to get too involved with the health of our churches. We think that it is all on us to read the signs interpret and apply the right principles. We give him a nod now and then and tell how God has blessed us, but it all pretty much went as planned. If it failed, then it was because we had not tapped into the right system.

What if the world looked at our churches and said, “Wow, how did that happen?” What if God was so central to the growth of our churches in such an unexpected way that others had to admit a miracle had happened? It can happen, and I hope it will.

chosing a loser

I have not traveled much, but I have been told on many occasions that in many countries a person’s future is determined for him fairly early on. In these systems, a student is at some point assigned to a college track or a trade school track. He or she does not really have a say in the matter. I once had a friend from Germany who came to the U.S. to go to college because she was placed on the non-college track back home. Her future was already decided for her. She had to travel across the Atlantic to have a chance at a different future.

In a similar fashion, a person who was to be a rabbi had to pass through several stages of schooling. At any point, he could wash out if the right people thought that he was not up to snuff. Those who were not up to snuff were sent back home to be a tradesman. Only the brightest and most talented people were allowed to make it to the place of being a disciple. Being a disciple would probably be equivalent in today’s world of being a medical intern. A person could not just decide to be a disciple.

This is why it is so unusual that Christ chose tradesmen to be his disciples. They had already washed out as some point. Someone at some point in their life has said that they did not have what it takes. Jesus could have chosen from many of the students in rabbinical schools of the day. No doubt, there were some promising intellectuals in the mix. No, Jesus went to fishermen, tax collectors and even someone from a terrorist party and asked them how they would like to join the elite of the society of that day.

I was taught from a young child by a very godly father that God seems to make a point of choosing the most unlikely vessels to do his greatest works. Scripture is filled with unlikely leaders, prophets and history makers. As God said to Samuel, “Man looks on the outward appearance, but God looks on the heart.” In a move that makes no sense in our understanding of the world, God chooses losers and makes them winners in his work.

Loosing ourselves in ministry

In ministry there is often the temptation to lose ourselves in the work of God. Ministry can be very rewarding, and can fill us with a real sense of purpose. I have seen many pastors get so involved in church work, that they let their lives and their families fall apart. Even in lay ministry many have spent so much time at the church doing the work of God that they have neglected those other parts of their lives. We often forget that those other parts are also holy.

For about a year now, I have been preparing for a possible ministry. During that time, I have spent many hours in prayer, reading and studying for a possible life of service. The other day, I noticed my dog was being particularly clingy. He would not leave me alone to read. He was jumping in and out of my lap, licking me and running around me. He kept bringing toys to me. This was his telling me that he missed me and needed more of me. He was telling me that, although I have been home a lot, I have not really been there. In my quest to study hard I had neglected the one life that God had put in my care.

One of the mottos of the Benedictine order is “work and pray.” Actually, in the way that this works out is usually “work, pray and play.” It is so easy to get involved with business and we neglect and nourishment of our soul. Our lives can become so prosaic that we forget about the poetry of life. We often forget that God made the world useful, but he also made it beautiful. St, Benedict teaches that life should be balanced. It is good from time to time to read a good work of fiction, paint a picture, play some music and dance.

For the next couple of weeks, I plan to focus on other things. I plan to start a new painting, teach my dog some new tricks and finally finish reading Silas Marner. I plan to take a few more walks with my dog. I will try to catch up with some friends. Mostly, I plan to take a deep breath and reconnect with myself.

The Ministry of Ears and Tears

I have been reminded recently about the ministry of ears and tears. We often think of ministry as doing something. In most churches, ministry is synonymous with activity. There are times, however, when activity is the opposite of what is needed. There are times when ministry is listening, and there are times when ministry is sharing a tear with someone. This can be one of the most powerful ways to incarnate Christ to others. It is in these places, that heaven touches the earth.

I treasure these moments, though many may not think it very manly. To weep with someone is to allow ourselves to be weak with them, to be vulnerable. This is not the place of the manager or boss. There is no place for ego or power plays here. It is a level of communion that is rarely ever seen on earth. These are sacred moments.

My Anglican Journey

I now have been an Anglican for over two years. During that time, I have benefited from, what for me, is a richer worship experience. Some of the words we use in worship have been used for hundreds of years. In the liturgy, there are touches of the Desert Fathers, the Doctors of the Church, and the millions of Christians that have come before me. There is beauty that reflects a God of beauty. Every Sunday, I leave a little more converted than the week before.

True Experiences

I was thinking one night of the idea of experiencing God. How do we know that we have experienced God? with the trend in churches of energetic music and large showmanship, how do we know that we are not being manipulated?

For me, the way to hear the true voice of God is in silence. Stripping away all of the noise around me, I am free to listen. Competing influences seem more distant. No exterior influence is driving me. I am not reacting to some environmental stimulus.

the other night, I awoke with a start. I felt the presence of God in a new way. I can’t explain it, but it was intense, comforting and frightening. At one point I was afraid that I would die if I stayed in that place too long. I returned to my sleep.

Was that a true experience of God? Sometimes I wonder. I suppose that the true test is if it left me changed for the better somehow.

So, I still wrestle with the question of the authenticity of my experiences of God. In many ways, we live in a synthetic world. It is not a true world, but a world of our re-imagining. This makes finding authenticity challenging.

My Sheep Hear My Voice

Jesus said, “My sheep hear my voice, I know them, and they follow me.” There are many who claim to hear the voice of God. A politician says that God told him to run for office. A pastor says that God told him that the church has to do this or that program. A lunatic says that God told him to bomb an abortion clinic. Can we say that any of these know the voice of God? Perhaps the former two were right, but the third is definitely mistaken.

Our culture is full of voices. We live in a country where everyone has his voice. We cannot turn around without being confronted with slogans, claims and assertions. How can we not lose the voice of God in the racket? Is it any wonder that, from time to time we make a mistake?

Perhaps the strongest competing voice is my own: my desires, ideas and agendas. Too often I do not acknowledge the sway that they hold over me. They are in the back of my mind whispering to me, “this way to the path of goodness.” It is only when I look in the mirror that I see that it is I who am talking and not God. Do I know God’s voice?

The ancients were honest about all these voices. They need to be acknowledged and confronted. We need to wrestle with them. We need to expose them for what they are. Only then, when we have come to terms with the voices of the world and the voices from within, can we be sure that we hear the voice of God.

And the Least Shall be the Greatest

A few months ago, I had the opportunity to meet a well known author. I have only read a few of her works, but have already become quite a fan. I have several times before had the opportunity to meet some of my favorite writers. As many become star-struck by rock stars, so I become star-struck by writers. At times, this leads me to become somewhat embarrassingly giddy when I meet them.

I often wonder why it is that we feel a special thrill in touching the famous and powerful. Is it that we feel that some of their greatness will rub off on us? Do we feel that power and talent can jump from one person to another like a flea?
If we look at Jesus’ life, it could not have taken him much farther from the rich and famous. He was not associated with the Herod clan, the major political powerhouse in Palestine at that time. His only brush with the royalty of the age was as a convict. Instead, he was a champion of the “little people.” He spent much of his time with the poor, infirm and uneducated. His closest followers were mostly tradesmen. He was ridiculed for being too much around the “wrong crowd.”

I remember reading this statement: “I like humanity in general; it is just in the particular that I do not like them.” I am sure that I have misquoted the writer somewhat, but the sentiment is the same. I love the poor from a distance. I sympathize with the suffering from a distance. It is in the particular – in the visceral closeness in which Christ operated – that I have problems.

I hope that one day I may have the humility to eschew being a respecter of persons. One of my goals in life is to love all equally regardless of their status in our world. I am a long way from that at present.

My Will and My Relations to Others

I have been thinking lately about my will and how it influences my relationship with others. I rub shoulders from time to time with some who are less easy to get along with. It may be that we disagree on something, or their sense of style or their values are different than mine. In some cases, I may have strong feelings about those differences. It is easy for me to assert my will, to say that I am right. In some cases I may even be right, but that is beside the point. I have a choice, I can demand that everyone fit into my schema, or I can surrender my will to have my way and accept people as they are. This may mean surrendering my “rightness” at some points. I have to be willing to allow someone to be (what I am convinced is) wrong. I have to be their servant. I find that I often struggle to find the humility to do this.

I have to remember what Christ has to put up with in me. As I look at my life, I have been wrong often. I have failed often. I have been different from the person that Christ would have me to me. Fortunately, He is longsuffering and loving. He is patient with me. Should I be any less with my brothers and sisters?

If we are true servants of Christ, then we are also servants to those to whom He was servant to. As Christ became a house slave and washed the feet of the disciples, including the one who would betray him, so we must become a slave in the house of God. We must serve the doubting, the loud mouth and the betrayer. It is when I become a slave to you and you become a slave to me that the whole community is reflective of Christ. In that community no one has any need to look after himself because his brothers are doing a much better job than he can do himself. However, since we too infrequently live in that community, let us do our part to serve those whom Christ served in the way that he served them to the extent that he served them.